I’ve been traveling almost 5 years now and it’s drastically shifted my perspective on every aspect of the world. I’ve learned so much about myself and others. It’s changed who I am and who I want to be. I no longer desire the traditional successful American life. This has ultimately made me undateable. The following reasons details why.
Non-Traditional Jobs
I have about 6 streams of income which allows me to be self employed through the sharing economy. This means I can make my own schedule and thus travel more. In American culture your career is your life. One of the first things people ask when they meet me is “what do you do?” like my worth is solely based on my job. Working long hours with little to no vacation is considered a successful life. A career to me now sounds like bondage no matter how high the salary is. I couldn’t imagine ever being an employee again. Sacrificing freedom for stability doesn’t make sense to me. I'm not saying there's something wrong with choosing to be an employee. It simply doesn't work for me.
Frugality
I used to amass expensive things but now my priority is living frugally. I’d rather go to Payless than purchase a pair of Jordans. I’d rather clothes from Salvation Army over Gucci. I prefer my small apartment on the west side of Chicago over a high rise by the beach. I care so much more about meaningful experiences than material possessions. I know many find happiness in these things but it simply isn’t the life I want to live. This is extra money that could be used on more travel not pointless possessions. I've taken on a minimalist lifestyle, mainly buying material things I need rather than what I want.
Apathy
When I’m home I rarely go out to places where single women frequent. I’m usually either working to pay for my next trip, planning a trip, or on the way to the airport. Nothing else matters to me. I’ve tried dating sites on and off but it’s an endless loop of mundane small talk until I inevitably delete my account. Most of the women I do meet are career driven so we have very little in common. The only time I’ve met women compatible with me is while abroad but they usually live in another part of the world so it’s a fleeting moment. I do desire companionship but another part of me wonders if it will only be a detriment to my life of travel. What do I gain from a romantic relationship besides tax benefits?
Spontaneity
Everyday is an opportunity for adventure. I will book a flight in a moment’s notice when I spot a great deal. I will get in my car and start driving unsure of my final destination. Living for the weekend is a depressing existence. My fun begins any day I want it to, not two days out of the week. My curiosity often requires a level of risk most might be uncomfortable with. This gets me in trouble sometimes but always makes a great story. Every new person I meet, mountain I hike, exotic food I try, unfamiliar culture I immerse myself into, is an opportunity to learn. This is the ultimate goal. I can count on one hand spontaneous friends I’ve had in my lifetime so finding a partner like this is an even rarer commodity. It isn’t a major requirement but I won’t hesitate to explore without her if she’s unwilling or unable to.
That having been said, I refuse to conform to societal standards. I’m having a great time with my life. This might mean I’ll be single the rest of my life but I’ve accepted this as a possible outcome of my lifestyle. It is well worth the sacrifice.
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